So I successfully got through my first month of being back in Austin! School has started and I made new friends. I know it sounds exceedingly silly to say that but I've found that it's often your classmates who help you get through class.... probably something to do with solidarity.
I went to mass this morning at St. Austin's. It's strange because I think about when I was an undergrad and my church-going behavior - or lack thereof. I did really well my freshman year but it tapered off significantly as a sophomore and junior. If it wasn't for Janel, I probably wouldn't have gone to mass much as a senior.
Then I moved back home and of course living with devout Catholic parents means if you're not going to the Vietnamese church with them, you damn well better be getting your religion on at another Catholic church. I've slowly discovered that I enjoy "American" (i.e. "White") mass more than Vietnamese mass, not because one is shorter in duration than the other, but I simply feel more comfortable with the language.
On the rare occasion that I attend mass with my parents, I am constantly amazed at how consistent and longstanding traditions are at the Vietnamese church: despite the various waves of immigration these churchgoers have been in, age, what village they came from back in the Motherland, where they're living now in the US, how proficient they are in English... none if that matters when they're at the church. Everyone knows the prayers and songs that have been passed down generation after generation. I think in many ways, the church acts somewhat as an equalizer. So in that sense, I can feel the ethnic solidarity because it's much more visible. But unfortunately, I spend too much of my time in Vietnamese mass as more of an anthropologist with outsider status than actually being engaged. Part of that has to do with the fact that my Vietnamese, though conversationally proficient, there are still a lot of words (I'll categorize them linguistically as 'Biblical Vietnamese') that I don't understand and that gap in vocabulary translates to apathy.
Switching gears to an "American" mass: obviously, the language barrier is nonexistent so understanding the readings and sermon is much easier. It's also much more diverse in terms of the individuals who attend mass. I mean that makes sense because if you didn't understand Vietnamese or Spanish for that matter, why would you attend that mass or church? When I was younger, I never cared enough to follow the readings on my own or really listen to the sermon, and it was very rare for me open my mouth and sing. But after college, I decided to become more engaged and involved during mass. I think that I've grown spiritually since the last time I lived in Austin but I can't really pinpoint the reason why. Was it because I was devastated that I left California and felt like a failure and I relied on religion and spirituality to help me pick up the pieces? Was it living back at home? Perhaps it was the social environment combined with increasing emotional maturity.
In any case, I'm happy where I am right now... which leads me my next topic: well-roundedness.
I made a comment earlier that this American societal/educational ideal of being well-rounded was simply another description for mediocrity. I thought that we as a society should be more like our progressive European counterparts and allow people to specialize early on. I think that was me being bitter about the economy and my liberal arts degree. But I think we can take the concept of being well-rounded and apply it our daily lives... not just for our resumes and CVs or applications to graduate programs but to our health (an obvious interest of mine as a budding public health professional).
In addition to my consistency in going to church without any reminders or coaxing from my parents, I've also been able to successfully integrate physical activity into my life. For the most part, physical activity became more salient in my life because of two things: (1) I was no longer able to play volleyball every day like I did as an undergrad and (2) I freaked out at the levels of physical inactivity and the public health implications of that. So I've been running regularly for over a year now! It's not a massive accomplishment like running a marathon, but it's a small victory for me. Running at the gym has becoming an activity where I can just take a break mentally and ignore the world as I escape into the music of my iPod and pretend I'm on my way to Broadway à la SMASH.
Before, I thought of being well-rounded solely in a pretentious academic sense. To me it meant having to be proficient in multivariable calculus, literary criticism, epistemology, programming in C++, and oh, speaking five languages would be fabulous too. But I don't think it necessarily denotes narrowly-defined academic measures. I think it simply means: don't focus too much on some esoteric shit that you lose sight of the fact that life is going on around and you're missing out.
Speaking of which - I had a reunion with the one and only Eliza Grace Huynh last night. It was so good to hang out with her after three years. I haven't laughed that hard in a while. =)
And on that note, I should probably read the research I've gathered so I can continue writing my paper. Then it's time for Once Upon a Time, Revenge, and The Good Wife!! WHOO!
